Taking a long break from twitter, and from posting in general...

It's official now, bois...

There's just too much malarkey going on. From twitter being run into the ground by a man whose brain is being boiled alive by conspiracy theories, to transphobes being unbelievably vile as Brianna Ghey's murderers stand trial... All of this is bad enough on its own, but on top of all of this sapping my will to be online, there's also been some real-life business that's been really kicking my butt. From work getting extra busy for (good and bad) reasons, to a pretty friggin' scary health emergency (I'm fine, everything's fine, but I'll be on meds, and off cardio -and Grindr, sorry boys-, for the next few months), and I'm just completely out of spoons.

What breaks my heart hardest, I think, is detransitioners going on grifting tours. Especially those that confess they still deal with dysphoria-related depression (and other issues) after detransition. It's just so wrong on so many levels, I don't even know where to begin. On one hand, it's a massive self-own, as they're helping those who would eliminate anyone and anything that isn't cishet (like those "LGB" doorknobs, who literally do nothing for actual LGB folk). And then it's not just incredibly harmful to trans/queer/nonbinary folks, but it's also, effectively, a backstab against the very people who tried to help them.

Just thinking about how narrow-minded and selfish these grifters are makes my blood boil.

Because, fair, maybe transition wasn't for them, but that doesn't mean it doesn't help others. It doesn't mean it isn't a net benefit to have these tools available for folks who need them.

I'm sorry, I just get so angry thinking about this...

Looking ahead

I plan to continue posting on bluesky (though that website tilts really hard in the opposite direction of twitter, so who knows how long it'll last) and Flickr. I would post on Tumblr, but it seems they're sort of backing down on their accepting nudity thing (I got a warning or something several months ago, I just laughed and deleted the app, bummer). And I'd post on bdsmlr, but they're more concerned with making money through crypto than making the website usable.

There's also an onlyfans I opened, but it's empty. I might just keep it free and post on there, but I'm not sure what rules exist around this. Real bummer everything going down though - believe it or not, I was working on a plan to do a face reveal and put some extra spicy content on it behind a paid subscription. Got me some neat wigs, was learning makeup tricks. That won't be happening any time soon now.

Oh, and just to be clear, posting will be super scarce while I'm dealing with real-life stuff. It sucks, but c'est la vie.

This blog will remain

And I'm looking forward to writing more posts, but this comes with a caveat that quality and content will be affected by how well I can stay away from social media negativity. I really want to talk about how my detransition is going, how I feel about it, what steps I've taken, etc., but it's hard when grifters are out there setting a negative tone and stigma around us.

Because the truth is that there's lots of us, and we all have a healthy relationship with trans and broader LGBT+ issues. I have two online content creator friends who are in a similar place; I've spoken to another person who is not a content creator who is also in a similar spot; and I recently stumbled upon a list of trans pornstars who've taken steps to detransition. All of our stories are different, but we all have one thing in common: we're male, but not masculine; we're feminine, but not female.

Heck, I even have an FTM friend who has recently become "ok" with being seen as a lesbian, and this is someone with whom I've never talked about sex or anything. Just a vanilla (as far as I know) person sharing details about their life and identity with me.

And I think we need more visibility, and I think we need to feel safe and respected, because we're just another expression of queerness - one that we're still figuring out.

So I'll keep writing about this as often as I have the spoons to do so - I have one draft that was overridden by this post, and a bunch of pages' worth of notes, too!

Staying in touch

Since I'm basically ditching twitter, if folks want to keep in touch, there's a few ways to do so. First, there's bluesky (it's @femboicharlie.bsky.social and I have a few invite codes available). Secondly, there's this blog - comments are open, and I will be keeping an eye on them. There's also comments and DMs (I think) on Flickr, and I've made myself a little Discord account (it's femmicharlie - femboi was taken...). I'm also contemplating starting a Twitch thing - it was part of the "face reveal" thing, and I'm wondering if it's worth going through with it without showing my face.

I also have accounts on instagram, snapchat, and reddit, but I hardly use them. If that changes, I'll make sure to share those, too.

Bye for now <3

I'm not even proof-reading this post, I just need to get this out there while it's fresh. Thank you for reading all of this, and being part of my journey. I hope you'll stick around as I navigate the things life throws at me, and as I search for a new online home; but I know it's a hassle, so no hard feelings if that's not in the cards for you.

 

Much love,

-Charlie